It’s been at least 24 hours – and I still feel like there’s a rock sitting inside my chest.
I described it to Simon yesterday, on the drive home, as sadness. That’s partly true – I think it’s also Weltschmerz and there’s one of those German words for which there is no perfect English translation.
We talked about it yesterday morning – about how overwhelming the news is and how ghastly it is – how the environment is deteriorating, how politics is frightening, how disasters around the world are truly crimes against humanity – and how, if we listen or read enough of the news, despair sets it – and least, for me that’s true.
As I have said more than once: I walk a fine line between keeping informed and retaining my sanity. Or perhaps, more accurately – retaining my light – my joy – my spark and sparkle.
Today I feel like I have lost my spark – it’s the big picture of the world but also the smaller picture of my life.
So I am plastering myself with mental band-aids – hoping I don’t run out.