Beautiful day today – for several reasons. First, after one day spent apart from my beautiful man, I am with him again. Second, we hiked. Third, we played Scrabble. Fourth, we giggled a lot. Fifth, we snogged quite a bit – and hugged and talked and just were who we are, and our being together is just plain wonderful.
But back to hiking. We went up the orange trail with Penny and had a beautiful day. What was once a tough bushwhack is now one of my favourite hikes on the mountain, and for the first time, I went down the steep pink trail and actually liked it quite a bit. Got my body moving and spent time in the beautiful, healing outdoors. What I’m trying to say is that today was perfect. It even involved not only chocolate, but a cup of Simon’s sensation hot chocolate. How could it get any better than that?
the title of this blog, however, says “hiking and more,” – and there is more. Yesterday I listened to a CBC program, or at least part of one. I tuned in At the point where an author was talking about a book he had recently published – the theme he wanted to explore, he explained, was “obsessive love.”
I thought about that and came to the conclusion that I knew exactly what he was talking about; at the same time I think he is wrong. There is no such thing as “obsessive love.” I know that now. I did not know that a few months ago. You cannot put those two words together. If it is obsessive, it is not love. You may think it is, but it is not. Perhaps it is a craving, a desire, a deep wish for something unfulfilled, but it is not love.
Love is not obsessive. Love does not hurt. Love does not cause suffering or pain.
Love is life-giving. Love brings joy and happiness. Love heals. Love gives – it does not take. Love is unselfish and it is beyond ego.
If love causes doubt, pain and distrust, it is not love. Love may and does disguise itself. We call obsessions and yearnings love because We have not experienced the real thing and we are programmed by stories and past experiences to give the name “love” to an often unrequited desire.
Sometimes, if we get really, really lucky and if we can look with eyes wide open and heart wide open, we can experience the real thing. That’smwhen we realize that love is infinitely kind, generous, soft, forgiving, accepting and life giving. Does that mean that love is without conflict? No, I don’t think so, but I also believe it comes with the commitment to resolve the conflict with the heart-felt goal of healing and caring as well as strengthening and deepening the love that is there.