Sometimes I can’t figure myself out.
Ha! I know, neither can anyone else. Ask any of my exes!
But seriously, folks, there I am walking in the park with Abby this afternoon, feeling really good because I have just finished a big story and work is essentially done for the day – and that is why I feel good: my achievement need has been met.
This, of course, is in direct conflict with my ambition to be lazy. At least, I think I want o be idle. I am so excited about my four-week vacation because of all the idleness. That is, if hiking up a mountain each day is considered idle and lazy.
I may as well admit it, to me laziness means a different kind of achieving. I know what happens when I have tow days in a row of really and truly nothing to do: I get edgy, testy, one could even say irascible.
I am an achiever. But it’s getting close to that time when my need has to be expressed in different ways. How many mountains are there to climb?
On another note, ducks are so interesting. Teh boys were hiking int he bushes and I was beginning to think they hated me for trying to lock them up at night. They wouldn’t even come around for food. So yesterday, I waded into the swamp on the other side of the pond to bring food to them. Today, they are back in the field, even approaching and going into their little “house” to get food. And they gathered around just as always. Whew! And to add to the exciting mix, the wild mallards are getting more and more friendly (more with the other ducks than with me) – it’s interesting to see these relationships develop. I suspect that eventually I will be feeding the wild ducks too.